(click on each group member for more info)

Dueling Bios! More Exciting than the Beatles VS The 4 Seasons!

A Brief History of the Weird Lovemakers, as told by their press kit.

The Weird Lovemakers started out as a lame 3 chord Punk band with a different name (Irving) and several different members (Bob, Chrissy, Shannon, Dave Riley). After settling into their longest running & most argumentative lineup (Hector Jaime - Vocals, Bass Greg Petix - Vocals, Guitar Gerard Schumacher - Drums, Vocals Jason Willis - Guitar, Vocals) and playing more shows than anyone would care to speculate on, they have evolved into one of the Southwest's best loved lame 4 chord Punk bands.

Their music, a cry - for - help "democratic" mixture of New Wave, Norteno, Doo Wop & Aboriginal Folk Songs, sounds an awful lot like the kind of high-energy Punk Rock you'd hope to find in any medium sized American city. None of the band members have a particularly well developed sense of fashion, and to date no Weird Lovemakers songs have been responsible for creating a "dance craze" (as in "Do The Vegemite").

Despite these crippling shortcomings, The Weird Lovemakers have managed to con a few suckers into paying attention to them; they played at the 1997 SXSW extravaganza in Austin, TX ("The Weird Lovemakers make the best Punk Rock I've heard in, like, 20 years" - The Austin Chronicle), were picked by the staff of the Tucson Weekly as "Best Local Alternative / Pop Band" in 1996, got a few songs into a film called "The Pornographer" (1998) (that you can read all about here), and have won the "Tucson Area Music Award" ("Tammie") for best Punk Rock band 3 or 4 times. Live they've played with a host of bands you've probably heard of (The New Bomb Turks, Superchunk, The Specials, Scared of Chaka, etc) and many, many more who maybe don't seem so impressive right now, but whose releases will someday fetch a princely sum on ebay as "rare representations of Turn Of The Millennium Punk Rock".

The most recent additions to the highly profitable and lucrative Weird Lovemakers catalog (see discography) are a pair of CDs to be released by Summer 2000. "Back 20" (Star Time) is a collection of songs recorded by the band on 4 track and dumped onto their drummers computer, and "Live: Bigger Than A Cookie, Better Than A Cake" (eMpTy) which documents a 1999 Seattle show full of broken strings, inane banter & stupid cover songs. There's a bunch of compilation tracks that've just come out too, once again, you can read about them here.

Currently The Weird Lovemakers are pretending that they're getting ready to record a slew of songs for a new studio LP/CD to be released by Seattle's eMpTy Records sometime in the next year, but in reality they can usually be found roaming the Tucson streets, surrounded by their legion of pre-pubescent fans; all of whom commit petty larceny.

A Brief History of the Weird Lovemakers, as told by the stinkin' drummer.

In 1992, Greg and I were living in Chicago, playing in another band where he was on drums and I played bass. I had always wanted to be a drummer- in fact, whenever Greg would run off to take a piss, I'd hop behind the kit and do my best to irritate everyone with the one or two beats that I could play. Greg had always wanted to sing in a band, and he could play guitar, so we formed a crappy little side project called Von Richter, in honor of Ron Richter, the guy who offered to play bass for us. In no time at all, we put together a five song set and got a gig at Stella's Musical Lounge, a goofy bulb blinking nightclub at the intersection of Milwaukee, Damen, and Division in Chicago's trendy - yet - brimming - with - shit Wicker Park district. Ron couldn't make it to the gig, so Greg and I decided to call the band The Weird Lovemakers, after a campy 60's Japanese sexploitation movie of the same name, and play the gig as a two piece. When we got to the show, our friend and outrageous drunk Dave Riley, who had played bass in Big Black, was there, and he offered to fill in. Greg and I sucked that night, so Dave had no choice except to stumble on stage and do his best rendition of a drunk guy trying to render a Jackson Pollock with a bass guitar instead of tins of paint. He gave up on the second song, and Greg and I hastily finished our set.

To pay the bills, Greg and I had been working at a magazine and newsstand, bundling and sorting and stacking and filing. We soon became fed up with Chicago and its crappy jobs, killer cold, and mega-rent, high crime housing, and decided to return to Tucson, AZ, where we had both lived earlier. At least rent was cheaper and friends were funner. There, we continued our crappy little band, and my girlfriend at the time, Chrissy, joined us on guitar. We also had a couple of bass players--Shannon, and later, Bob. We changed our name for every live show, going through names like Man Goo, The Obsequious Motherfuckers and Grudgefuck, finally settling on the name Irving, after a pathetic girl's best friend but never gets laid character in one of Greg's songs. By 1994, Chrissy had moved away and Bob quit the band, so we asked Hector, a friend of ours who was the best guitarist we knew to fill in on bass for a while. He liked it and agreed to stay, and we found Jason at a local record store. Jason had impressed us with his Gary Numanesque guitar work in a prior band of his, so we thought he'd work out. With Jason in the band, we decided to change the name back to The Weird Lovemakers, which we did. That summer, we recorded our first songs, "Kate Moss" and "Sugarcandy Mountain", for a split 7" on Ghost Town Records. Our set list grew rapidly, as we had four songwriters in the band and a "No Veto" rule whereby any member of the band could insist we include a song no matter what the others guys wanted (our set is now at about 110 songs- they've been coming a little slower lately). In 1995, we released our next 7", entitled "Irving", ourselves, and Gouramie Records put out "Electric Chump" our first CD in 1996. In the summer of1997 we recorded "Flu Shot" which Seattle's eMpTy Records released in May of 1998. We'll be on tour as much as we can, so look for us in your home town!
- Gerard

Hector Jaime
Hector in red

Hector Jaime (Vocals, Bass) was born in Nogales, Mexico in 1972. He graduated from Nogales High School in 1990 and received his B.A. in Media Arts from the University of Arizon in 1994. He almost completed a Master's degree in Hispanic Literature, but dropped out due to stress, hatred, indecision, and, the only good reason, rock music. In addition to music, Hector enjoys the occasional comic book, eating tofu (the smell reminds him of file folders), drinking bourbon, hiking and sex. Write to him here.

Greg Petix
Greg loves hot dogs

Greg (Vocals, Guitar) doesn't think that he's lived long enough or done enough to merit any sort of biography. You can e-mail him here.

Gerard Schumacher
Gerard's Picture

Gerard (Drums, Vocals) has been a 7th, 8th & 10th grade teacher (he claims, however, to love 9th graders), a newspaper vendor, a dishwasher, a bank teller, a lightbulb guy, a pool cleaner, a fry guy, a movie usher, a record store clerk, and a coffee pourer. Loves rock and roll music; hates jobs. Here's his e-mail address.

Jason Willis
Jason's Picture

Jason (Guitar, Vocals) has become part of the problem and not the solution due to his job as a marketer & designer of online pornography (we'd love to tell you WHERE he works, but due to the HIGHLY SENSITIVE school that Gerard works at, we can not). He spends his spare time squandering his ill-gotten gains on ebay; please do not outbid him. Feel free to email Jason here. You can also feel free to send him that dusty old copy of Volume: The International Discography of the New Wave #2 that you have laying around. And any old skinny wrap-around sunglasses too. Please.